When You Just Can’t Talk About It
You want to be able to be yourself, open and free, when you’re with your partner.
But there are topics that are difficult to talk about. These topics seem like landmines you must navigate around during every conversation, so you’re always on edge. These conversational landmines prevent you from feeling free to be fully yourself. When you have to hide parts of yourself, your relationship doesn’t feel intimate or as fulfilling as you want it to be.
Even if you can’t name any specific evidence of your disconnection, you can feel the separation between you.
You want to be available to your partner when they need you and you want them to come to you for comfort when they need it. You want the same in return. When these periods of feeling disconnected happen, you don’t seek comfort in one another. When you’re also hurting, you may not even want to comfort them.
When it gets like this, it almost feels like your relationship has a splinter that keeps getting jammed in deeper, hurting both of you and your connection with one another. This isn’t the type of relationship you want. You want a deeper connection. You want to feel confident and secure about your relationship and you want your partner to feel that way, too.