How to Support a Gifted Child

It’s not a scenario most parents will ponder but those with gifted children have no choice. They have to step up and supply their unique child’s unique needs — but how? Often, such parents become hyper-ambitious. Like a stage parent, they end up orchestrating every step of the kid’s life and this is not always a good thing. In addition, the parents of a gifted child can feel isolated. Other parents can’t relate and thus, there isn’t an abundance of role models.

Even so, with patience and discernment, you can do the right thing for your child. It’s not the path you expected but nonetheless, you can still find your way.

The Ups and Downs of a Gifted Child

The first giant step in supporting your gifted child is doing the work to understand more about how they think and feel. Talk with them, of course, but also engage in diligent self-education. Here are a few important elements to watch for.

Intensity

Gifted children tend to go for the gusto in areas like:

• Communication: They want to be understood and this means having a strong need to talk and be spoken to. As they get older, gifted kids will seek out certain adults who seem to get them the most.
• Concentration: Whatever they do, they give their full focus. Even if it’s mealtime, bedtime, or an emergency, gifted children appear unable to stop once they’ve begun concentrating.
• Persistence: Since certain skills come easily, they can become very persistent about learning all skills — even when it’s not their specialty.
• Perfectionism: When a young person stands out in the crowd, they don’t yet have the cognitive or emotional skillset to handle this attention. It can provoke perfectionist behaviors.
• Emotions: The emotions of a gifted child (or teenager) run deep. As a result, they can have very strong reactions to events that others may brush off.

Socialization

This can be the trickiest aspect for parents to navigate. Your gifted child may struggle to relate to chronological peers but not be emotionally mature enough for the older friends they prefer.

Overconfidence

When you stand out in a crowd, it can go to your head. Thus, it can be quite valuable to have your gifted child partake in activities with which they struggle. It teaches humility, resilience, and nuance.

A Big Way to Directly Support Your Gifted Child

As you can see from the list above, your child will probably need help with their social life. Through no fault of their own, they are operating between socially accepted categories. Therefore, it can be invaluable to guide and coach them in areas like:

• Role-playing with them to hone their friend-making and friend-keeping skills
• Develop tools like active listening
• Making sure there’s always room in their schedule to see current friends and meet potential new friends
• Gently check them if they slip into a habit of bragging about their gifts but do not encourage them to play down their accomplishments
• Recognize that everyone has a unique value that is not always measurable in math grades or piano concerts

Getting Outside Help

For starters, it can be a game-changer to enroll your child in programs that allow them to interact with kindred spirits. You don’t want to limit them to only gifted friends, but it can be very motivating for them to be accepted within a group setting.

Even so, both you and your child are navigating uncharted waters. Ideally, you’ll connect with a child counselor who can support you both as you learn. If the above information resonates with your current situation, let’s set up a free and confidential consultation. This journey is unique but absolutely doable.